The scariest things about ghosts

From D.W.: In Houston it can take a while before you actually start to feel the Summer fade into Autumn, but it's happening. It's never the full-fever flame out that you get in more northern climes, but it happens. And boy, is it ever full of metaphors.

Here's a few thoughts about change in all its forms:

Facebook. October 24th. 2017

The Ohio River Valley: Where the intense and colorful majesty of autumnal foliage is mitigated by the intense and colorful gunk free-flowing from your allergy-gooey eyes and the low-level misery of the selfsame allergic headache...

MAGIC. I LIVE IN A LAND OF FREAKING SEASONAL MAGIC.

Long Valley Lane. October 8th. 2008

contemplative wednesday

In our life there is a single color as on an artist palette, which provides the meaning of life and art...
It is the color of love.

—marc chagall

one of my little old guys died last week, on thursday. he had moved to sonoma to live with his niece last february. he had big blue eyes, always wore a turquoise ring, smoked like a fiend, and had a little pug dog named "doc". he woke up on wednesday to see if his social security check had cleared. he told his niece to tell me thank you for the card i'd sent him the week before (the picture and quote are at the top of this post), and to tell me he was sorry he'd missed my birthday. and then, he died. i cried like a little kid when my boss told me that story. i still kind of want to cry, thinking about it. adam was a wonderful person, a dear man, someone with a lot of love in his heart, and so many stories to tell. i am so glad i got to know him.

Facebook. November 1st. 2004

in thanksgiving for the souls of all faithful departed...

well, it's that frequently forgotten holiday that gets sandwiched in between the sugar orgy that is halloween and the turkey--gobbling binge that is thanksgiving. it's all saints' day today– incidentally one of my very favorite of all church holidays. it's a good time to remember those who have gone before us, and to be thankful for their influence in our lives. it's a nice day, without being all sad and droopy. except that the weather today, combined with my allergies is making me a little droopy, nonetheless.

you know, there are a thousand ways a person can die. and i don't mean just die like cease to respire. sometimes people die out of our lives through no fault of their own-- people grow away from each other; not every relationship has the shelf-life of a twinkie. sometimes people move away, and distance proves too wide to cross. sometimes people turn into other things, and we realize that things are not what they were, things will not be better, and it's just time to cash out and cut our losses. and yes, sadly, sometimes people just really do die. but being sad about any of those things for very long is just as bad as not being sad at all.

case in point-- there was a girl (that's me), who once upon a time loved a young man very much (that's him). and the girl and the boy were very good friends and sometimes were other things. and there was much phone calling, and letter writing, and email sending, and present giving, and votes were cast, and stars were read, and prayers were prayed, and futures were discussed. and one day, the girl and the young man woke up to find that both of their worlds and views had very much changed, and that nothing they thought they had in common was really in common anymore, except for the fact that they kind of knew some of the same people, and were in a lot of photographs together. but the things that had kept them up for hours talking and sharing now just kept them up for hours arguing and trying to score points. and so, they became ghosts to each other.

would you believe that last week i walked right by that ghost? and i was grateful. grateful for what i've learned, for what i've seen. i was grateful that i've learned to stand on my own two feet, and that i'm not scared any more that someone might leave if i say or do or believe the wrong thing. it's good to not be scared anymore. sometimes the scariest things about ghosts are what they show us of ourselves-- and it was good to see that the other side of me is doing ok-- not that it's all in the bag, but hey, i didn't throw up like i thought i might, and i enjoyed my evening out with a dear friend. and you know what? i hope the ghostie enjoyed his night out, too.

at any rate, thanks for listening.

mil besos--r