Sorry about your lactose, dude
From D.W.: Maybe it's because Autumn is creeping in. Maybe because I just had lunch with a very old friend I hadn't seen in 15 years. Or maybe it's just because I'm kind of hungry today, but I thought I'd share a couple of food posts today. More specifically, recipe posts. Food was absolutely a love language between Rachel and me. And I presume the same was true for many of you, too. There weren't many things that could make her more excited than a good breakfast taco, a bowl of chili, Saturday afternoon brisket, or crawfish season. Many of the best memories I have started with the two of us finding or making something delicious together. And when she got in the kitchen herself, every dish was a chance to show her love for you. As if we needed proof.
Anyway, here's some recipes you might like to try this fall:
Facebook. June 12th. 2022
Sometimes, I just wake up thinking about tacos. And by sometimes, I mean like twice a week.
Facebook. December 19th. 2020
No one:
Me:
For a big ass pot of this delicious tomato soup, you will need the following:
Five onions (that you need to use up because you made the grocery list while on the couch trying to remote view the contents of your pantry and failed in spectacular fashion.), thinly sliced.
A container of what was fresh spinach last week and was starting to look slightly desperate. Bless it.
Some mushrooms (maybe like ten or twelve?) that would otherwise need to go find Jesus on the compost pile if you fart around and don’t cook them in the next three to five days. Cut these into whatever passes for slices these days.
Two cubes of beef boullion or chicken or veg. Unwrapped.
Four cans of tomato soup (I used Campbell’s because it’s what we had and I like it.) rinsed out with milk (or cream if you’re nasty...or just water if you’re nasty but don’t do dairy).
Four soup cans of water.
1/2 stick of butter or whatever cooking fat you want. I am not here to tell you how to live your life, but you could also use a couple of TBLS of bacon fat or olive oil or what have you.
Red pepper flake
Basil (dried is fine)
Salt
Black pepper
Garlic powder
Cayenne pepper
***
Get your big ass soup pot on a medium heat and melt some butter. Once your cooking fat is liquid and lovely, maybe sprinkle in some red pepper flake. Make like Bob Marley and stir it up.
Throw your onions and mushrooms in the cooking fat and roll them around. Add salt, pepper, and garlic. You can also shake in a glurg of Whoseyoursister Sauce (I like Lea and Perrins). Stir this. Set your phasers to blast this at like...a four on a ten point heat scale because stove knobs are liars. Put a lid on this. Set a timer for like...45 min. Walk away and stare at a wall or your phone until the alarm and the delicious smells remind you that the world does exist.
Check your goods. They should have given up some liquids and be all floppy and ready to party with the new kids. If the onions and mushrooms have not caramelized to your liking, keep going til they are. Once you have your onions and mushrooms looking like something you would def want to have dinner with, go ahead and throw in your sad container of already/not yet spinach. Let them wilt in peace. Avert your eyes as you remember the salad you promised yourself you would make...with strawberries and red onions and blue cheese crumbles. This is the way.
Now, the hard part: open four cans of soup and dump them over the onion/mushroom/spinach. Rinse out the cans with milk/cream (not into the sink, into the soup). Then rinse them out with water(not into the sink, into the soup). Rinse them out again with water, but this time in the sink and place them piously in the recycling bin. Add both bullion cubes, a hefty sprinkle of black pepper, a couple of meaningful shakes of cayenne, garlic like you mean it, and basil to your taste.
Stir and simmer for about ten min. Taste your soup and see what you think. Adjust salt and spices as you wish. Pop the heat to low and let it be for like...30 min? And then you can eat it. With a spoon. I know things are bonkers but honest to God, we’re not in ThunderDome yet.
Pairs well with grilled cheese or whatever. And it’s pretty tasty the next day, as well. Prolly would not recommend as a freezer soup b/c of the dairy, but you could def freeze it if you omitted the dairy. (If you omit the dairy, sub in an extra bullion cube, and just use water to rinse your soup cans. Sorry about your lactose, dude.)
rachie
Facebook. March 21st. 2020
In the next couple of days, some of you may require this for various reasons. It may or may not resemble others of its kind. I read several iterations of this version one summer decades ago, and this is how I do. Please use it with wild abandon. And may it bring you comfort and joy:
*have it with coffee or tea or other equally delicious and wholesomely responsible adult beverage of your choosing! *
DONUT BREAD PUDDING: A PERFORMANCE ART LOVE POEM THAT COULD ALSO BE A MATH AND SCIENCE LESSON OR ALSO JUST DELICIOUS
If you’re using a dozen stale donuts (48 hours is best, IMO...)
Cube up your donuts—if they are still kind of springy, you can toast them off super quick in the oven.
In a deep casserole: Whisk together four eggs and two cups of milk (you can use cream. You can also sub a cup
of flavored coffee creamer, if you want). Whisk in your spices—cinnamon, nutmeg, clove, whatevs. Be as liberal as you like. I would use a couple teaspoons of cinnamon, about a quarter tsp of nutmeg, and a dash of clove. And a 1/4 tsp of salt. One glug of vanilla—like a teaspoonish? Add one cup white sugar and one half-cup brown sugar (depending on how sweet your donuts are, you can piddle with that.) Whisk this mess til it smells delicious and looks well-blended.
Dump all your donut chunks into the milk/egg/spice business. Stir all this around—but try not to bust up the donuts too much.
Cover and refrigerate overnight, or at least 6hr. After soaking, if it still looks juicy, throw in a couple of handfuls of rolled oats and stir them around. Also, if you want to add butterscotch, caramel, or chocolate chips (or raisins...please don’t), now is the time. Also, also, you can put a few slices of cold butter on top of everything because BUTTER is just another word for love. Dust with cinnamon.
Bake at 350 for about 45 min, or until the middle is set/not crazy gummy. You can glaze with a little bit of powdered sugar thinned out with a smidge of milk (if you want, you can add a smidge of bourbon or rum or coffee to thin your glaze, as well. etc.
**recipe tested by actual Swedish teenager and tasted by her mother an actual Swedish person and my birthday twin persister Marla Bergdorff.
